I’ve recently noticed a TV commercial geared to seniors that talks about planning their futures, including funerals. They want older viewers to get their booklet, “nine things” seniors should know. I don’t typically pay any attention to these kinds of ads as I’m not a senior and I know they just want to sell stuff but the announcer says something odd:
“…Discover the difference between having a respectable funeral or something less than you deserve.”
How kind of them to want to explain the “difference” to us, in case we’re unsure. I have often stopped and wondered just what IS the difference between the two. And how can I discover it??
The phrase “respectable funeral” is a head-scratcher. Aren’t funerals generally supposed to be respectable by definition? I mean what might an unrespectable or disrespectable funeral look like? Would there be a cardboard box for you (maybe a big Amazon one) instead of a casket? Would people mock you and comment on what a loser you were? Maybe people would wear cut-offs and flip-flops. Or there’d be loud, burly biker dudes, and beer cans tossed about, and strangers making out in the back row. A not-respectable funeral is open to so many possibilities!
“…something less than you deserve.”
What you deserve? What dead you deserves? This makes me think of Steve Martin’s King Tut song which I’ll quote from memory: “When I die, now don’t think I’m a nut, don’t want no fancy funeral, just one like old King Tut.” What we deserve… I expect most of us are going to get more or less what we deserve, which isn’t to say we’d like it!