Short Thought 175 (bitches and assholes)

When I was younger and in conversation, and a man said of himself, “I can be a real asshole sometimes,” or a woman would volnteer that she could “be a real bitch sometimes,” I’d usually ask what they meant by that, looking for a little more explanation. I no longer ask anything. I just take them at their word – and worse.

19 thoughts on “Short Thought 175 (bitches and assholes)”

  1. M. Oniker

    Yup. And the corollaries: 1) Someone who has a sign up on their desk at work about “a no drama zone” is the biggest drama creator in the building, 2) People who lead with, “Hi, I’m (name). I’m a Christian (or vegan, or atheist, or…)” are usually the worst examples of the group and should be avoided, 3) People who refer to you as “my friend” rather than your name, “Hello, my friend” probably isn’t one and/or can’t remember your name. 4) The person at work who “jokes” that she is a Facebook stalker, is, so post accordingly. 5) Men who constantly claim they are “in touch” with their feminine side, really aren’t, unless their feminine sides are bitchy lesbians who want in your pants, 6) People who have to tell you over and over that they aren’t xyz (lazy, racist, snobs, etc.) are exactly that.

    People are weird.™

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    1. writerinsoul Post author

      I got another. Anybody who tells you what a nice person they are (look out!). I find also that people who talk a lot about how sensitive they are are telling the truth – but they are sensitive to their issues/concerns not yours.

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        1. writerinsoul Post author

          Thought about this more overnight. I don’t believe people when whatever they’re saying or showing doesn’t suit the picture in my head, when I am so sure things could be different, i.e. better. I have worked hard to believe people ARE what they show me.

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          1. Maggie Wilson

            I think we are talking the same thing – in my case, with an ex-husband who disclosed some pretty damning things about himself – but I chose to diminish his story, or rather to rewrite it in a way that fit with what I needed. “Sure, he was that way before, but he’s changed his ways now.”

            Like that?

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            1. writerinsoul Post author

              Yes, exactly. I’ve seen red flags and to!d myself they were pink. There were times I knew better and proceeded anyway. Or I got myself in emotionally – probably too quickly – and then heard/saw things that didn’t sit right but because I was already “in” it, minimized them. Also, and this is bad, I didn’t want to reject someone for what they revealed because it seemed unfair or would hurt their feelings. Today? I’m an improved woman.

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  4. Kate Crimmins

    During house hunting this past weekend, we met a new (to us) realtor. She spent 10 minutes telling us how great she was and about her background as a teacher. (Perhaps that’s why it took so long! We were in kindergarten.) Then she handed us a bio with all the same stuff. When we walked out we agreed to use another realtor if we bought the house. She never asked us about our interest in the house….or anything at all.

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    1. writerinsoul Post author

      Not to broad brush teachers but I find that they often use the “teacherly” tone with everybody (and I find it annoying). It doesn’t help that the m.o. of the day is to present yourself as a brand and sell, sell, sell regardless of your occupation. Figuring out what people want (i.e. what someone wants in a house) and showing how you can provide it is a rare, underused gift.
      …by the way, you’re house hunting?

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      1. Kate Crimmins

        Sort of. We need to downsize but are unwilling to give up the space we currently have. The house we looked at is a ranch putting everything on one floor (good) but neither the taxes nor the land are significantly smaller. It also needs a new kitchen and bath (work, not good). The one bath had pink fixtures. We will look until a miracle happens or one of us has a health crisis that forces our hand.

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      2. Kate Crimmins

        Also, you are correct about teachers. My good friend is one and sometimes I have to remind her that she’s not in a classroom. They are good people just used to a different communication style. The realtor was definitely selling herself instead of the house.

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