Short Thought 65 (lies and betrayal)

I cannot imagine what it must be like for someone to learn that the person they believed was their father – or their mother – was not in fact. Or for someone to learn much later, even after divorce or death, that their spouse had affairs or other children. I would think it would cause the betrayed person to attempt to revisit and reframe every last experience, every last memory, an effort both exhausting and impossible. I know how I feel when faced with lies of much smaller stature; how must it be to confront those which pull everything you know, that define who you are, into question?

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5 thoughts on “Short Thought 65 (lies and betrayal)

  1. Jim Link

    Oh yes, Colette, such revelations must have staggering repercussions on the betrayed person……….Bobby Darin discovered in his early 30’s that his older “sister ” was actually his mother and that his “mother” was actually his grandmother! The family was concealing the fact that Bobby was born out of wedlock….Think of how that shattered every preconception he had had of WHO he was and the moral nature of the universe, so to speak……..

    On a minor level,I knew a guy, a remote friend, who died in a car crash years ago, whose funeral I did not attend. When I asked his ex-girl friend how Charlie’s daughter was taking her father’s sudden death,she told me that Charlie had had no children, that he just invented a “daughter” to justify living with his mom for financial reasons, and to manipulate her feelings toward him!

    I was stunned , and still don’t understand the dynamic there. ..

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    1. writerinsoul Post author

      I recall the mother/grandmother thing. I wonder just how much that went in the past with the stigma of “out-of-wedlock” offspring.

      I too continue to be shocked by the lies people tell (and often get away with for a long time).

      Wynonna Judd didn’t know who her real father was till she was 30.

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  2. auntynini

    It’s not so bad. The “fear” surrounding these types of situations often cause people to make choices they believe (at the time) will minimize heartache OR pain OR open cans of worms. It is rarely, if ever, out of malice that folks choose to keep loved ones in the dark. Focus on intention. Compassion and non-attachment is called for.

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  3. C. E. Robinson

    After knowing for years about family lies and dark things in the closet, I find them interesting to remember and analyze family dynamics back then. Some of it will be storylines. Thanks for the push to include hidden hurts!

    Liked by 1 person

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